Building Safer Tables: Part 1 - Why Your TTRPG Table Needs Safety Tools (And How I Learned This the Hard Way)

This is Part 1 of a Building Safer Tables series. [View the complete series roadmap below]

When the practice space for being human becomes unsafe, the learning stops. Here's how to keep it safe enough to matter.

The Moment Everything Changed

Picture this: we're two hours into a Monster of the Week game with a table full of strangers. The mystery is been going well; I've been perfecting it for weeks. A player makes a choice that has us all stunned. Two players turn off their cameras. I can sense the discomfort, but I'm not sure how to address it without stopping the whole game. So I don't. I let it ride.

By the end of the session, both cameraless players had gone silent, one had checked out entirely, and I spent the evening and subsequent day wondering if I could have done things differently. The story we were supposed to tell together had become a story about power, discomfort, and exclusion instead. I was still relatively new to running paid games and reeling from what I could feel was an important lesson.

That's when I realized something crucial: if TTRPGs are practice spaces for being human, then unsafe tables aren't just unpleasant. They're teaching the wrong lessons entirely.

What Safety Tools Actually Do (It's Not What You Think)

Here's what I wish someone had told me years ago: safety tools aren't about preventing all discomfort. They're about creating the conditions where meaningful discomfort can happen safely.

Think about that troll bridge scenario from my previous post. The pressure you feel when making that decision? That's good discomfort. It's the kind that teaches you something about courage, creativity, or moral reasoning. But if you're sitting there wondering whether the person next to you is going to use this moment to make you uncomfortable in a completely different way, that's bad discomfort. It hijacks the learning and turns the practice space into something else entirely.

Monte Cook puts it perfectly in his design philosophy: we should "design toward" the behaviors we want rather than "design away" from problematic ones. Safety tools work the same way. They're not barriers. They're infrastructure for better stories.

The Tools That Actually Work (At Real Tables)

After that game, I started implementing safety tools religiously. I've always had an open door policy, but it was time to make some changes. Here's what I use today:

Session Zeros: Building the Container

Every game I run starts with a Session Zero, but not the way most people think about them. The concept isn't new. It emerged from the indie gaming movement of the early 2000s, particularly around games like Dogs in the Vineyard and Sorcerer that demanded explicit conversation about heavy themes before play began. What started as a necessity for morally complex games has become standard practice for good reason. Yes, we create characters, but more importantly, we create the story space together. I ask questions like:

• What kind of heroes do you want to be?

• What does the long game look like for your characters?

• What themes are you excited to explore?

• What would make this game feel like a waste of your time?

  
  

That last question is crucial. It gets at boundaries without making people expose their trauma to strangers.

Lines and Veils: The Living Document

Lines and Veils were originally discussed by Ron Edwards in his 2004 supplement Sex and Sorcery for the game Sorcerer. Edwards was grappling with how to handle mature themes in games that explicitly dealt with moral corruption and supernatural horror. His solution was elegantly simple: Lines are hard boundaries—content that stays out of the story entirely. Veils are soft boundaries—things that can happen "off camera" but don't get detailed screen time.

What's fascinating is how this tool evolved from a specific need in horror gaming to become foundational infrastructure for all kinds of collaborative storytelling. The original context was about handling demons, violence, and moral ambiguity, but the community quickly recognized its broader applications.

But here's the key: I frame these as collaborative storytelling choices, not personal limitations. Instead of "What are your triggers?" I ask "What kind of story are we telling together?" It's subtle, but it changes everything about how people engage with the process.

The Open Door (And Why It Matters)

Everyone at my table knows they can step away at any time, for any reason, without explanation. Bathroom break, phone call, just need air—whatever. But more importantly, I model this behavior. I take breaks. I step away when I need to think. I show that prioritizing your needs isn't disruptive. It's responsible.

The Research That Changed My Mind

Anthony Bean and Megan Connell's research on TTRPGs in therapeutic contexts found that "participating in these groups can help individuals with mental health conditions such as anxiety and depression... Additionally, TTRPGs require teamwork and communication, which can help improve social skills, form resilience, and build relationships."

But here's what clicked for me: those benefits only emerge when people feel genuinely safe to be vulnerable. If your practice space for being human doesn't feel safe, people don't practice being human. They practice being guarded, hypervigilant, or performatively agreeable instead.

The goal isn't to eliminate all risk or discomfort. As Susan Haarman's research suggests, TTRPGs function as spaces for "dramatic rehearsal" precisely because they create meaningful pressure and consequences. The goal is to ensure that pressure serves the story and the learning, not someone's need to dominate or shock.

The Professional Reality

Here's something most articles about safety tools won't tell you: implementing them made me a better GM, not just a more ethical one.

When I know exactly what content is off-limits, so I can craft adventures that push boundaries in the right ways instead of accidentally stumbling into harmful territory. When players trust that their comfort matters, they take bigger creative risks. When everyone knows the container is solid, they're willing to get more vulnerable with their characters.

The most challenging area for me continues to be cross-player consent, or making sure one player is genuinely okay with what another player wants to do involving their character. I've learned to pause and ask explicitly: "Sarah, Tom wants his character to cast a spell that would read your character's memories. How does that land for you?" It feels clunky at first, but it's become second nature.

The Evolution Question

The TTRPG community has changed dramatically. We're more diverse, more aware of power dynamics, and more intentional about inclusion. People who argue that safety tools are unnecessary because "we never needed them before" are missing the point: we weren't creating practice spaces for everyone before.

As the Indie Game Reading Club puts it: "we, the people, are more important than any collective story we tell together." This isn't about coddling anyone. It's about recognizing that if we want TTRPGs to be genuine practice spaces for the full range of human experience, we need infrastructure that supports that goal.

What I Wish Every GM knew

Safety tools enhance the game experience. They don't restrict it. Here's what I've observed at hundreds of tables: comfortable people play better. They take bigger risks, invest more emotionally, and contribute more creatively. They're willing to fail in interesting ways because they trust the people around them.

When someone pushes back against safety boundaries, my policy is simple: one warning, then removal. This isn't baseball. We don't need three strikes when someone is actively undermining the safe space we're trying to create together.

For new GMs reading this, start by filling out safety tools yourself. What are your lines and veils? What makes you uncomfortable when you're playing? Understanding your boundaries makes you infinitely better at helping others identify and respect theirs.

The Bigger Picture

TTRPGs are technologies for practicing humanity, as I wrote in my previous post. But that practice only works when the space itself is conducive to learning, growth, and meaningful risk-taking. Safety tools aren't about preventing all harm. Sometimes, they're about ensuring that when discomfort and challenge arise (and they should), they serve the story and the learning rather than someone's unexamined power dynamics.

The modern TTRPG experience demands intentional design toward safety, inclusion, and collaborative creativity. These practices aren't constraints on our hobby. They're what allow it to live up to its potential as a space for genuine human development.

Coming in this series:

• Part 2: The Hidden History of TTRPG Safety Tools - From Ron Edwards' groundbreaking 2004 work through the community innovation that gave us today's comprehensive toolkit

• Part 3: When Safety Tools Failed (And Succeeded) in Actual Play - Real-world case studies from streaming shows and convention disasters that shaped modern practice

• Part 4: The Academic Research on Gaming Safety - What the literature tells us about trauma, therapy, and creating genuinely safe learning environments

This series will form the foundation of our comprehensive guide to implementing safety practices in professional and personal gaming contexts.

Questions for Reflection

Before you implement these tools at your own table, ask yourself:

• What kind of learning environment do you want to create?

• How do you currently handle moments when someone seems uncomfortable?

• What would change about your games if everyone felt genuinely safe to take creative risks?

• What are your own boundaries as a GM, and how do they shape the space you create?

Sources:

• Bean, Anthony, and Megan Connell. "The Rise of the use of TTRPGs and RPGs in therapeutic Endeavors."

• Cook, Monte. "Design Toward Rather Than Away." Monte Cook RPG Design Theories, October 5, 2023.

• Edwards, Ron. "Sex and Sorcery" discussion of Lines and Veils, 2004.

• Giordano, Michael. Study of novice TTRPG players and legitimate peripheral participation, 2022.

• Haarman, Susan. Research on TTRPGs as spaces for "dramatic rehearsal," 2022.

• Indie Game Reading Club. "TTRPG Play Culture: Safety and Consent," 2020.

• Stavropoulos, John. "X-Card: Safety Tools for Simulations and Role-Playing Games," 2013.